Bush to Osama:   "I'll hunt you down myself!"
Beginning July 7  the president will be hunting down Taliban and Al-Qaeda until August 30, when he returns to Washington. The president's base of operations is secret, although  press secretary Ari Fleisher did reveal that it is located near or on a ranch in Texas.

Vice President Richard Cheney will be hunting Taliban in Martha's Vineyard until July 28, at which point he will refocus efforts on the Hamptons.

US Set to Pursue Ruthless "Operation Manana"
In a joint operation to locate Osama Bin Laden, the CIA and FBI are about to embark on their most ambitious search yet, "Operation Manana."

Beginning tomorrow, agents said they can imagine scouring the countryside in traditional garb to root out  suspected terrorists and address the ideas and propoganda that motivate them and inspire their followers.

 
"This is what we mean when we use the term, 'intelligence,'" a senior official told the New York Times.

The official refused to be quoted by name, as did the reporter.

New Spin on Old Technology Adds Powerful Weapon into US Intelligence Arsenal 
Next Monday, intelligence officials will deploy a new weapon in the war against terrorism, a device commonly called the telephone. "Using this device, we can make 'telephone calls' to pursue clues we are given," said FBI chief Robert Fraudlihd.

Previously most clues were provided by newspaper articles, said Feuhtrid. "The drawback with that form of intelligence was that the newspapers largely focused on terrorist acts after it had occurred. We believe that knowledge of terrorist activities in advance will prove even more valuable to the Merican public."

But gathering this sort of information will require a far more sophisticated strategy, Fruahlind explained patiently to reporters at a press briefing Thursday.

One example is the case of the World Trade Center attack, which came eight years after  Al-Qaeda's unsuccessful  attack on those buildings. In the years that followed, Intelligence officials guessed that the  terrorists would attempt to finish the job.

While officials were told that airplanes had become popular in terrorism circles, they also knew that terrorists faced the problem of not knowing how to  fly. "Using telephones, we could have simply called flight training schools every few months or so and compared their rosters to our lists of known terrorists," Fracklin said.

"This new tool will be able to increase our intelligence."